Reasons Your Mommy Should Not Be Kissing Santa Claus
--He has 2000 years of
cookies caked onto his teeth
--After the second kiss,
all the kids get locked in the closet
--Isn’t that grandpa in
that outfit?
--Last time she kissed him
you got your jolly brother Dennis
--He smells like reindeer
--The Easter Bunny gets
jealous
--He’s got a scorching
case of herpes
--Every time she sleeps
with a fat man, he has a heart attack and dies
--Once you've had
Santa, you never go back.
--She's not just
kissing Santa, she's kissing every elf he's kissed too
--His stubble causes
a rash on her thighs
