How Marty's Corner Will Be Better If We Win An Emmy
--Fart jokes will be 20% more
brilliant
--We'll get the scabies cleaned from the guest couch
--Leo and Tony will wear loincloths
--Marty will show less cleavage
--Fewer guests with multiple convictions
--We'll class up the show with even more hilarious
Kierkegaard references
--Marty will stop saying, "13 Years Of Sub-Emmy
Entertainment"
--Hairless cabana boys at the executive pool
--Marty will hire some funny writers
--Fewer puppets. More busty dudes!
--No more imitation butter in the bathrooms
--Dubs for Marty's posse
--PSAs will be replaced with Marty's celebrity sex tapes
--Marty will upgrade his implants and stuff his shorts with
brand-name socks
--We'll bring Dennis Miller on the show. And Marty will
shoot him right between the eyes.
--The Marty's Corner Dancers will actually know how to dance
