TOP 11 REASONS TO GET RID OF THE TOP 11 LIST
11) When a colon examination is funnier, it's time to throw in the towel
10) Murder rates increase following a particularly bad Top 11 list.
9) Heavily armed audience members keep threatening to "bust a cap" in Marty's ass
8) Every time we broadcast a new list, the terror alert level goes to orange
7) Charles Manson loves the Top 11 List
6) Comedy this bad is not protected by the Constitution
5) Top 11 Lists cause cancer in laboratory mice
4) The church has threatened to defrock Marty
3) The Secret Service is afraid that George Bush will laugh so hard he'll choke on another pretzel
2) Hans Blix has declared the Top 11 List a weapon of mass destruction
1) Did you notice that funny smell? That's the Top 11 List.
